Monday, January 05, 2009

god's pharmacy

i got this email forward a couple months ago, and it has crossed my mind thousands of times since then, so i figure i should post it up here for posterity.

It's been said that God first separated the salt water from the fresh, made dry land, planted a garden, made animals and fish... all before making a human. He made and provided what we'd need before we were born.

These are best & more powerful when eaten raw. We're such slow learners...

God left us great clues as to what foods help what part of our body! God's Pharmacy! Amazing!

A sliced Carrot looks like the human eye. The pupil, iris and radiating lines look just like the human eye... and YES, science now shows carrots greatly enhance blood flow to and function of the eyes.

A Tomato has four chambers and is red. The heart has four chambers and is red. All of the research shows tomatoes are loaded with lycopene and are indeed pure heart and blood food.

Grapes hang in a cluster that has the shape of the heart. Each grape looks like a blood cell and all of the research today shows grapes are also profound heart and blood vitalizing food.

A Walnut looks like a little brain, a left and right hemisphere, upper cerebrums and lower cerebellums. Even the wrinkles or folds on the nut are just like the neo-cortex. We now know walnuts help develop more than three (3) dozen neuro-transmitters for brain function.

Kidney Beans actually heal and help maintain kidney function and yes, they look exactly like the human kidneys.

Celery, Bok Choy, Rhubarb and many more look just like bones. These foods specifically target bone strength. Bones are 23% sodium and these foods are 23% sodium. If you don't have enough sodium in your diet, the body pulls it from the bones, thus making them weak. These foods replenish the skeletal needs of the body.

Avocados, Eggplant and Pears target the health and function of the womb and cervix of the female - they look just like these organs. Today's research shows that when a woman eats one avocado a week, it balances hormones, sheds unwanted birth weight, and prevents cervical cancers. And how profound is this? It takes exactly nine (9) months to grow an avocado from blossom to ripened fruit. There are over 14,000 photolytic chemical constituents of nutrition in each one of
these foods (modern science has only studied and named about 141 of
them).

Figs are full of seeds and hang in twos when they grow. Figs increase the mobility of male sperm and increase the numbers of sperm as well to overcome male sterility.

Sweet Potatoes look like the pancreas and actually balance the glycemic index of diabetics.

Olives assist the health and function of the ovaries.

Oranges, Grapefruits, and other Citrus fruits look just like the mammary glands of the female and actually assist the health of the breasts and the movement of lymph in and out of the breasts.

Onions look like the body's cells. Today's research shows onions help clear waste materials from all of the body cells. They even produce tears which wash the epithelial layers of the eyes. A working companion, Garlic, also helps eliminate waste materials and dangerous free radicals from the body.



i will never look at figs the same way again


starting gumbolaya


starting gumbolaya, originally uploaded by skippy haha.

just add shrimp, scallops, crab, oysters, and rice and simmer

son of a gun we'll have big fun

2009 has been stellar so far

the tar heels lost to BC last night but those scrappers deserved it.

'no country for old men' is a ridiculously good movie.

clamato + vodka + worcestershire = bloody clam = perfect breakfast

holden's mask arrived and he HATES it. of course. like he might claw his eyes out trying to take it off. looks like i'm not going to make him wear it 24-7 afterall.

peace on earth, goodwill to men

Wednesday, December 31, 2008

happy new year


sappy, originally uploaded by skippy haha.

i hate to be sappy but i hope everybody has a peaceful warm exciting refreshing inspiring cozy new years.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

free love

someone who wants to buy condoms from ingles grocery store needs to ask a pharmacist to open a locked glass case where they're kept with nicotine patches and heart rate monitors. i imagine that could be an absolutely ridiculous deterrent. i'm sure it's to prevent theft, but jesus christ they should have free buckets of condoms at the front door for anybody willing to use one.

Monday, December 29, 2008

caught on tape - shoplifting dog





i tried to get holden to do this at a chapel hill harris teeter in about 1999. one night my friend jill and i put on sunglasses and took the white pole that hangs off horizontal blinds as a walking cane, and put the old navy dog raincoat onto which i had stenciled 'guiding eyes for the blind - dog in training' on holden and we let him out of the car near the entrance to the grocery store, hoping he'd run in & go to the meat aisle and take something out and cause some cute mischief. but holden just sat in the parking lot looking at us.

the dog in this video is my new hero.

Sunday, December 28, 2008

not a chill to the winter


brick cross, originally uploaded by skippy haha.

once in a while you can get shown the light in the strangest of places if you look at it right

Thursday, December 25, 2008

the holidays are here and we're still at war

brett dennen's christmas carol:



lookin for someone to set us free
a king with fists like muhammad ali

merry christmas from the early 80's


xmas 82, originally uploaded by skippy haha.

me: flying reindeer! on my roof! tonight!

chris: presents! presents! presents!

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

xmas tree 82


xmas tree 82, originally uploaded by skippy haha.

may your days be merry and bright

footwarmers


footwarmers, originally uploaded by skippy haha.

i thought i hated cats. howard is henry's brother and a sweet kitten who likes to snuggle and doesn't act like a sneaky liar who is merely tolerating my presence. i would still run one over with my car to avoid an accident, but he's melting my lump of coal heart. they sat like this on my feet for an hour this afternoon while i read.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

way happier

fluffy holidays from my cutest brother henry:


other good news - i am dogsitting another dog named henry this week & he is the same colors and a good boy too


other good news, holden will look like hannibal lecter with his cage muzzle mask and might turn from world's wussiest to more studly, he will at least look very scary

so fucking sick

holden is the worst dog in the world.

he threw up his dinner last night undigested

i stayed up all night convinced he'd eaten something cloth and deciding to put him to sleep

i can't deal with this

compulsively obsessive dog has to be watched every damn second

i took him to the vet when they opened & they x-rayed him & saw something in his stomach and not yet in his intestines, and gave him the amorphine shot and he threw up two fucking socks

i have no idea where he got them, they were not mine - i guess out in the yard.

$300 of dog puke later here i am

i am going to hell but i wish he had died

i can't deal with this anymore

does anybody want a free dog?

i am serious.

i can't afford a dog like this anymore. mentally i can't.