Friday, October 27, 2006

clark, what do you need a hammer for?



Thursday, October 26, 2006

nacho sheds

Wednesday, October 25, 2006

hound dog

you said you was high class

Monday, October 23, 2006

a couple from the midwest

back from a great two days in madison and chicago!

kitshickers in the madion concourse, photo: parttown


come in peace and seek out your cheese, who is fun to have on roadtrips?

our hero & the warrior king


who else would change channels at the airport but chicago city cops on segways?

good times!

Friday, October 20, 2006

happy anniversary mom & dad!

i hope your day is more fun than a shrimp convention in texas!


i'm headed to the midwest & that oven mitt made of cheese they call wisconsin for the weekend!

Thursday, October 19, 2006

seeds

if you dumped some kind of organic seeds (fruit, vegetable, grass, tree, or) onto landfills would good prevail

Wednesday, October 18, 2006

smog


jj wanted something 'the colors of the sunset'



i made some california smog




which will color the sunset till it's gone




Tuesday, October 17, 2006

nachos alertos

Monday, October 16, 2006

happy birthday bobby huntington!

i hope you have a great day & don't let that punk henry boss you around!

Sunday, October 15, 2006

cops love me

10/14/06 3:30PM

Pulled over in Del Mar
Followed for past mile from highway twisting streets neighborhood by
dark shark of roads
patrol car
flashes lights
Officer A. Garcia badge 50-ish
short of course stout aviators khaki
license registration proof of insurance
did i do something wrong?
i'll tell you just as soon as you do what i just said
hand license from wallet
reach to glove box
ehh- it's okay - everything in your name? -the registration?
yeah yeah all me
well heather you know what you're sposta do at a stop sign?
stop
yeahhhh- you rolled through not one but two stop signs usually you see a patrol car behind you people come to complete stop or they been drinking--?
i haven't
Loud beeping sound muffled operator walkietalkie
okay i'm gonna let you go today with just a warning heather
writes my name in all caps in pocket notebook
but you're gonna hafta show some more effort-?
sure yeah okay
okay boots on gravel turn walk back
shaking hands shift to drive
i thought i stopped




Saturday, October 14, 2006

how they got there

stats from october 06 kitshickers.com-


Top 20 of 31 Total Search Strings

#
Hits
Search String

1 23 20.35%
ivan drago
2 15 13.27%
sexpanther
3 10 8.85%
kitshickers
4 9 7.96%
her spandex
5 8 7.08%
beaner
6 6 5.31%
ivan%20drago
7 4 3.54%
redteam
8 3 2.65%
trampolines
9 2 1.77%
drago rocky iv
10 2 1.77%
female target
11 2 1.77%
ivan%20drago%20pictures
12 2 1.77%
kickball teams southern california
13 2 1.77%
moose drunk
14 2 1.77%
mooseknuckles
15 2 1.77%
rocky 4 drago
16 2 1.77%
rocky drago
17 2 1.77%
rocky ivan drago
18 2 1.77%
ruggy joesten
19 2 1.77%
tuck-oop scoop-uk
20 2 1.77%
www.kitshickers.com


stats from october 06 vintagevantage.com-

Top 20 of 1153 Total Search Strings

# Hits Search String

1 3908 37.00%
vintage t-shirts
2 598 5.66%
steroids
3 495 4.69%
vintage vantage
4 328 3.11%
cowgirl
5 300 2.84%
vintage t shirts
6 298 2.82%
rednecks
7 279 2.64%
mud trucks
8 213 2.02%
vintage tee shirts
9 181 1.71%
tuna
10 168 1.59%
noodling
11 115 1.09%
2 live crew
12 104 0.98%
vintage tshirts
13 97 0.92%
jack johnson
14 93 0.88%
vintage tees
15 80 0.76%
weekend at bernies
16 70 0.66%
vintagevantage
17 69 0.65%
vintage tee
18 61 0.58%
chunky
19 58 0.55%
hoochie
20 57 0.54%
vintage shirts



i want to find the two people who searched for "tuck-oop scoop-uk"

Friday, October 13, 2006

conversation between supermarket produce workers

A: hey i got a invitation on myspace to a party down in TJ

B: i’m good with TJ i got boys in TJ. a friend of yours?

A: naw i don’t know

B: are you gonna go?

A: no i don’t think they like white boys down there

B: it’s cool man i can go with you if you want

A: cool yeah okay


Thursday, October 12, 2006

restaurant waste

sell by today
or throw it away
make you some more
a big tub before
the trash men
come empty your tray

enough for an army
or family of five
served all to one
that old principal's wife
and she eats like a bird from benin

fold up your manners
remember your napkin
if asked to say grace
just say
thank you sweet garden
of heavenly bounty
a bountiful heaven on earth
here today
with you all
peaceful blessings
of health and great cheer
let's dig in

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

simple if then logic


i shouldn't see the driver


Tuesday, October 10, 2006

not longing haiku 49-55

ignorance is bliss
and yet we're still compelled to
learn at every turn

oh jesus christ god
almighty give me someone
to blame besides me

the toasty warm lives
i imagine for others
are cold & grinding


fertility drugs
blessing the rich with the curse
of the poor masses


if he could live that
long would all Holden's hair turn
gray eventually

cover your bases
with plastic foam padding &
you'll never get home

how long will you just
hide behind your bad choices
and pray for sunshine

Monday, October 09, 2006

guadalajara joe's latest antics!

guadalajara joe does gerardo better than gerardo!

(Gerardo's Rico Suave) Vegoose Contest

Sunday, October 08, 2006

tootie's bong

Tootie's Bong

"look here
BONG
BONG
BONG
...
we figured if we couldn't be in the group, at least we'll have the same stuff"

Saturday, October 07, 2006

junk on the trunk

Friday, October 06, 2006

i'm on an asian urn


"'Beauty is truth, truth beauty,—that is all
Ye know on earth, and all ye need to know.'"
- John Keats, "Ode on a Grecian Urn" 1819

Thursday, October 05, 2006

toubab krewe at winston's


great show friday night, check them out if you like to hear guys play stringed gourds and logs.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

exactly as i found it


here they come, the new arrivals
ready to lose a little bit of their innocence
ready to be free --

thrift store in north park 9/30/06


Tuesday, October 03, 2006

see it

Monday, October 02, 2006

please share my umbrella


someday my name and hers are going to be the same

Sunday, October 01, 2006

kali yuga


these hands of invisible organic forces
are pushing and pulling us



the germ of transcendence is always within us, at least

Saturday, September 30, 2006

three colors

Friday, September 29, 2006

not longing haiku 41-48

without tomorrow
should i save or should i spend
is a no brainer

to look like this is
my destiny what i do
with it is free will

wet empty sorry
evil danced in the shadows
it was a bad trip

lucky or perfect
if you're perfect you're lucky
not the other way

everybody's got
opinions but nobobdy
knows where they come from

the holy grail is
two faces together and
also the gold cup

to sleep means to dream
of concrete & dark & tires
rest these puffy eyes

it would be a crime
to live all these days & die
without yodeling

Thursday, September 28, 2006

comes around

Wednesday, September 27, 2006

sic balls chopper

what do you do when you're at the driving range
95% of the mats are taken
the one in front of you is not
a man comes onto it
in flip flops & a pitching wedge, drops a ball, hits it lazy one hand
turns, faces you, not even 2 or 3 feet away, straight ahead, and watches

ignore no eye contact be the ball you're not being the ball danny

he makes stupid jokes comments questions thinks he's adorable

not 2 feet away shoulders square intense scrutiny

walk away change clubs he's still watching facing, not hitting his own, only watching you

makes jokey apology for being annoying

i say you know what? i come here to be by myself & hit balls & not think for a little while, NOT to meet people

he mumbled stammered got brave said some confused shit about finding random things on the sidewalk that brighen your day still thinks he's adorable

walk away change clubs turn back to him still staring relentless

can't swing can't think slice topped ball after ball he never turns around

do something
see his head's the ball, bend knees, soft hands, hit 5 wood like 200 yards on the fly

you want the rest of these?

what? so you're just leaving?

have a good one

what? have a good one? that's all i get?

what's your name

heather

i'm james

see you around




Tuesday, September 26, 2006

fall has fallen

did you think those pumpkins stacked themselves?

Monday, September 25, 2006

festival del mar


without love, where would you be now?




Sunday, September 24, 2006

flowerstruck

Friday, September 22, 2006

pushing his luck


ralph's grocery store, san diego, 9/21/06 8pm


*also, happy birthday to the prima beccarina! shining star of milwaukee!

Thursday, September 21, 2006

city livin

i go for a walk & smell nothing sweet
pounding fake rock with balls of my feet

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

hot tub fever = "so, you know, if you're feelin cold just think like this" - DL

listen along to ALO

read along with the words:

With a little bit of heart, and a whole lotta soul,
we're gonna get the damn thing heated
Tried before in years in the past, but this time, I won't be defeated
Cuz i drew the map and the diagram and put all the parts in place
and as Memorial Day comes to a close, I feel that time and space have come together to help me finally see this through
so by evening-time, I hope to be kickin it with you
taking the time we all deserve
maybe sipping on a gin-and-tonic, maybe smokin on a little herb
in our hot tub
even if it has to use water from my shower to get it hot
I gotta do what i got to do
cause i've carted this thing around, and I won't stop just yet
until i feel the warm therapeutic blast from the hot tub's hyper jets
Come on over and sit in my hot tub
Feel the warm therapeutic blast
You see, we were broken men at the ends of our ropes
hot with hot tub fever in their groins and in their throats
erractic behavior. loss of self control
tearing up our front deck, digging big fat holes
in the middle of the night so the owner wouldn't catch on
gravediggers in the cemetery, gone before the dawn
hot tub fever! he's got this crazy look in his eye
he spent 60 bucks on a brand new pump from those bastards down the street
30 more for chlorine, 100 to fix that leak
we spent all our money on the hot tub, until we don't got enough to eat
hot tub fever! burning in our brains!
if i could sit in it just once, I think I'd be okay
Come on over and sit in my hot tub
Feel the warm therapeutic blast
For the last four years, we've been trying to get this thing to work...


ALO here!

Tuesday, September 19, 2006

longing haiku 25-32

intense interest in
what you do all day how your
hours while away

waiting for the one
he would've moved for if she
had only asked him

deeper the valley
higher the mountain better
the view from the top

fresh green sap rush up
spiral thrust down spread out now
take root bloom like mad

the melody brings
me back to backseats when the
sun was clean & hot

you thought what i thought
our eyes meet flicker flicker
i thought what you thought

make me laugh so hard
i want to put you in my
pocket forever




Monday, September 18, 2006

not longing haiku 33-40

the sun goes down &
to be awake feels wrong &
lamps lit, we fight it

lost tossed would like to
gather moss but can't find a
rock to crawl under

if my last words are
it was fun while it lasted
things went pretty well

if i were a man
i could take a walk right now
without being scared

the cops have been called
you have set off an alarm
leave while you still can

one thing i believe
there is nothing inspiring
about suicide

we were friends one time
your petty desperation
ruins another meal

say the same things til
you melt into one big dull
person with no point

Saturday, September 16, 2006

new pictures up


click here for more

Friday, September 15, 2006

modelfest2

modelfest 2 tonight, last time was so much fun






Wednesday, September 13, 2006

nacho house holden





Tuesday, September 12, 2006

funshy

if i scare you
it's your fault
your mind is closed
youre free to judge me
the choices i make
do not harm me
would not harm you
i never pressure
i never preach
you'll never see
& it's your loss
my friend

Monday, September 11, 2006

jim reilly is in national geographic

this month's national geographic has a picture of a picture of jim reilly on p. 20





where you at clarence?

all we are saying is give peace a chance

Sunday, September 10, 2006

but better

avocado it's like butter avocado it's like butter but better avocados are like butter

Friday, September 08, 2006

happy birthday phil! adios j, j & m!

at midnight, guadalajara joe led us all in 'happy birthday' to shiny haired phil!

i went to santa barbara yesterday for
jay & jess & miles' going away dinner/art sale/music show and it was fantastic.

loving the west indian girl spacey trippy rock that rolls


kind of like the flaming lips but easier on the eyes & just very damn good


art show!


jay gets down to another awesome performance by tweener king guadalajara joe!

damn i'm going to miss that guy on the dancefloor.

not so fantastic was the deal at the hotel santa barbara. hotel security shut down our 'party' before it even started.


they didn't buy the line that it wasn't a party, we were working, it was a photoshoot. it was only 7 or 8 of us, fine upstanding citizens, being civil and polite and not drunk, wanting only to converse reasonably and maybe have ah beer and that's it.

on the train home today i wrote some lyrics for "welcome to the hotel santa barbara" (to the tune of the eagles' classic 'hotel california').

Welcome to the Hotel Santa Barbara
We'll kick you out
You don't even have to shout

Plenty of room at the Hotel Santa Barbara
Where it's always late
And we don't negotiate

Party in the lobby
not up in your room
no one has a good time here
we're the hotel of doom
nice people kicked on the sidewalk
at 2 AM
if they're not registered guests
out the door with them

Welcome to the Hotel Santa Barbara
now it's time to go
this means you, G-Joe

No livin it up at the Hotel Santa Barbara
grumpy front desk guy
just won't let it slide

Booooooooooooo





and then just about 40 minutes from home, my train smashed a small pickup truck and man who was driving it. trainwreck in encinitas.

hope you had a great birthday phil, dig the spirit of 76, and best of everything (mejor de todo?) to jay, jess & miles the intrepid adventurers in search of a home that fits their vibe in cadaques, espana.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

honeydripper

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

the second tape i threw out of a window


in Senor Hoffmann’s 10th grade Espanol, i threw a listening comprehension

cassette tape out the second-floor classroom window

while El Profesor was out of the room &

everybody saw me do it –

after Mitchell Kent bet me $5 i wouldn’t.

Once El Profesor realized the tape was gone, he freaked

his stooped little bald headed thick-ass glasses-ed

self out & announced his plan to ferret out

the criminal(s) – which was more homework

for everybody, more quizzes, and bringing in

Dr. Sullivan (aka Dr. Vullisan) the slick smirky steely Asst. Principal



and the singling out of the 1

kid in the class of color as the likely perp.

he was from the Dominican Republic,

named Alfonso Hernandez mr. charming &

he was getting blamed for it if nobody (me)

stepped up and admitted it. The reason Al got blamed is

because i’d written a note to El Professor

in semi-broken Espanol (thereby throwing him off

my trail – i had bueno enspanol) saying that

“I threw the tape out the window & ‘the

machine that eats the grass ate the tape’”-

which was true – by the time i

looked for the tape the next week, it was

gone, in its place cut grass.

so Al was getting blamed, Dr. Sullivan was

called in, El Profesor wasn’t letting it

go like i'd thought he would and

fucking Mitchell kent that rat

bastard hadn’t given me $5.

so i fessed up & had to go

to Dr. Sullivan’s office & explain it &

he was kind of laughing the whole

time & instead he talked about writing

his dissertation on Eliot’s “The Hollow Men”

and gave me a copy of the

poem out of his file cabinet to keep &

it was about men stuffed with

straw of clothes stuffed with straw and

just about how fake everything is. So he let me off with a

copy of “The Hollow Men” & a bill for $35.50

to replace the whole set of tapes

from D.C. Heath Publishing Company.

El Profesor had to think it was funny deep

down, too & Al was proud of me for

coming clean i’ll never forget his eyes

in class when he realized he was the one

being singled out wrongly accused


in the end we’re

all alright

except for fucking Mitchell kent who

never gave me my $5