Flops and the Halloween Meatballs

 

What do you do when it's 7:30 on Halloween night and there's a line of hundreds of kids in costumes at the door and you've run out of candy?

If you're my grandfather, Dick Tramonti, circa 1963, in a neighborhood full of trick-or-treating kids in Rhode Island, you take a small meatball that you've made for dinner, wrap it in a napkin, and put it inside a kid's candy bag while surreptitiously grabbing a handful of the kid's candy from their bag to give away to the next few kids. 

Once you've run out of stolen candy, you simply put another meatball in a child's candy bag and steal some more candy out for the next trick-or-treaters.

My mom estimates at least 12 kids went home with meatballs in napkins that Halloween.

Easy Funny Vintage Halloween Costumes

The world does not need another Sexy Black Cat this Halloween. Be different! Be funny! Be comfortable!

1. Be a Physics Team Coach. (wear goggles, carry magnets).

2.  Be Owner of the World's Cutest Cat. (carry stuffed animal, or real animal, or photo album).

3. Be a Chop Stix Express Delivery Person. (wear an Asian hat and carry a box of chow mein).

4. Be Michael Jackson from "Beat It"  (no one wants to be defeated).

5. Be a Brand New Grandma.

6. Be a Beauty Pageant Contestant. (wear a big wig and a tiara, carry a dozen carnations).

7. Be a Senior Olympian - Elderly athlete in the Haywood County Senior Games: (green) 

and/or red for a two person cosutme:

8. Be a Concessions Monitor (check/take everybody's drinks).

9. Be an Oscar Mayer Hot Dog salesperson. (carry a bag of buns).

10. Be a Mall Walker (Wear wind pants and wrist weights). (Another one available here for a funny 2 person costume).

11. Be a Football Quarterback.

12. Be the Captain and Admiral of the "Breezy" yacht. Easy funny Two Person Halloween Costume:

These costumes are easy, quick, cheap, comfortable, and reusable, and it won't take you 10 minutes to remove them to take a piss.

Happy Halloween!